"You had more energy in your voice than I've heard.. ever" -Elder Merrill to Sister Glover (she's basically dead, apparently)
What to share, what to share. So much happened and I don't know where to begin.
Early in the week, I was reflecting on what I'm doing here/why I came on my mission. I wrote in my notebook as I thought about it and wrote: "I want to FEEL every aspect of this work. Why am I here if not? Do I do this work because I'm supposed to? Because that's what missionaries do? Maybe in part, but I want to get to the point where I am truly immersed in it.." and Heavenly Father definitely took that desire and ran with it. This was one of the hardest weeks of my mission. I felt like I wasn't getting answers to my prayers (and that's kind of the basis for doing ANY missionary work) so I felt hopeless. But I think that's what was necessary for me to be more invested. I started working harder to take my mind off of myself cause it wasn't fun to think about how I felt, to be honest.
BUT, because of that, we saw some really great people and had way uplifting experiences! (which, let's be honest, I needed) We went to see Steve who I may or may not have mentioned before. He's really cool. In his earlier days, he "drove truck" as the people say, and rolled his semi TWICE. The fact that he's alive, let alone that he can walk and talk and function on his own, is a major miracle. We talked to him about how the gospel has been restored and asked him about how Christ's life has impacted his. What he shared blew me away. he talked about Judas Iscariot and how he doesn't think Judas really betrayed Jesus but was in reality, Christs most trusted apostle. Interesting thought huh? I think Steve relates to him a little because of the way his life has played out, not entirely sure. But I do know that Steve is super great and I definitely have already learned from him.
Later in the week, we saw this kid strolling down the street, so we asked if we could walk with him and he said yes, so we did! and we talked the entire way about joy v. happiness and how we find actual joy in this life(hint: through Jesus Christ and his Gospel). He was really cool and you could tell he was actually processing the things we said. I'm pretty sure he kept walking past where he was headed to continue the conversation too. It was way cool. God places us in the paths of those who need to hear from us, sometimes it takes longer than 2 minutes though.
I realized that Saturday night. We were out tracting and pleading with God to direct us to where He needed us and I didn't feel like I could hear anything or feel any sort of inkling about what He was saying. It didn't feel like He was saying anything. In a last attempt, I opened the Book of Mormon and flipped to a random page: 3 Nephi 11:3-30 was before me. I closed the book, closed my eyes and flipped to a random page again: the same exact page. And I read. "And behold, I am the light and the life of the world; and I have drunk out of that bitter cup which the Father hath given me, and have glorified the Father in taking upon me the sins of the world, in the which I have suffered the will of the Father in all things from the beginning." Then on the next page, verse 41: "Therefore, go forth unto this people, and declare the words which I have spoken, unto the ends of the earth." So we did, and it didn't get better that night, but Sunday was. And I was reminded of why I am here. I have a testimony of this gospel. I know that Joseph Smith saw God the Father and Jesus Christ, His Son. I know that the Priesthood has been restored and because of that, we have full access to Christ Atonement through baptism and through receiving the Gift of the Holy Ghost. I know I can be with my family forever, and look forward to that whenever I miss them. I love our Father and our Savior, and I know they love me and it pains them to see me hurt and struggle, but they are with me.
I love you all, I hope you have an amazing week, and that you can feel Gods love for you and act on it.
Sister Shuldberg
p.s. I gave away Mason's copy of the Book of Mormon and Sister Glover and I have decided they are to be married :) Isn't that exciting? Congrats Mase! haha
Early in the week, I was reflecting on what I'm doing here/why I came on my mission. I wrote in my notebook as I thought about it and wrote: "I want to FEEL every aspect of this work. Why am I here if not? Do I do this work because I'm supposed to? Because that's what missionaries do? Maybe in part, but I want to get to the point where I am truly immersed in it.." and Heavenly Father definitely took that desire and ran with it. This was one of the hardest weeks of my mission. I felt like I wasn't getting answers to my prayers (and that's kind of the basis for doing ANY missionary work) so I felt hopeless. But I think that's what was necessary for me to be more invested. I started working harder to take my mind off of myself cause it wasn't fun to think about how I felt, to be honest.
BUT, because of that, we saw some really great people and had way uplifting experiences! (which, let's be honest, I needed) We went to see Steve who I may or may not have mentioned before. He's really cool. In his earlier days, he "drove truck" as the people say, and rolled his semi TWICE. The fact that he's alive, let alone that he can walk and talk and function on his own, is a major miracle. We talked to him about how the gospel has been restored and asked him about how Christ's life has impacted his. What he shared blew me away. he talked about Judas Iscariot and how he doesn't think Judas really betrayed Jesus but was in reality, Christs most trusted apostle. Interesting thought huh? I think Steve relates to him a little because of the way his life has played out, not entirely sure. But I do know that Steve is super great and I definitely have already learned from him.
Later in the week, we saw this kid strolling down the street, so we asked if we could walk with him and he said yes, so we did! and we talked the entire way about joy v. happiness and how we find actual joy in this life(hint: through Jesus Christ and his Gospel). He was really cool and you could tell he was actually processing the things we said. I'm pretty sure he kept walking past where he was headed to continue the conversation too. It was way cool. God places us in the paths of those who need to hear from us, sometimes it takes longer than 2 minutes though.
I realized that Saturday night. We were out tracting and pleading with God to direct us to where He needed us and I didn't feel like I could hear anything or feel any sort of inkling about what He was saying. It didn't feel like He was saying anything. In a last attempt, I opened the Book of Mormon and flipped to a random page: 3 Nephi 11:3-30 was before me. I closed the book, closed my eyes and flipped to a random page again: the same exact page. And I read. "And behold, I am the light and the life of the world; and I have drunk out of that bitter cup which the Father hath given me, and have glorified the Father in taking upon me the sins of the world, in the which I have suffered the will of the Father in all things from the beginning." Then on the next page, verse 41: "Therefore, go forth unto this people, and declare the words which I have spoken, unto the ends of the earth." So we did, and it didn't get better that night, but Sunday was. And I was reminded of why I am here. I have a testimony of this gospel. I know that Joseph Smith saw God the Father and Jesus Christ, His Son. I know that the Priesthood has been restored and because of that, we have full access to Christ Atonement through baptism and through receiving the Gift of the Holy Ghost. I know I can be with my family forever, and look forward to that whenever I miss them. I love our Father and our Savior, and I know they love me and it pains them to see me hurt and struggle, but they are with me.
I love you all, I hope you have an amazing week, and that you can feel Gods love for you and act on it.
Sister Shuldberg
p.s. I gave away Mason's copy of the Book of Mormon and Sister Glover and I have decided they are to be married :) Isn't that exciting? Congrats Mase! haha
Comments
Post a Comment